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How to Make Use of Dark Feelings and Dixon White’s Example

May 2, 2015 By TodaysTherapist

Dixon White

There is an unexpected freedom that arises as we acknowledge the dark parts of ourselves; defensiveness, judgement of others, exaggerated entitlement, and participation with the “isms” racism, sexism, etc.  This freedom comes about because it is exhausting and poisonous to defend a belief that is not true.  It is poisonous to others and poisonous to ourselves to live in a state of mind that is based on crazy ideas about me or him/her/them.

A common belief is  “My way is better than your way”; however, it is just “my” point of view.  This attitude can expand to my family,  my style of living, my money, my country, my race, my religion, and so on.

We can observe that particular argument in marriage, relationships of all kinds, and anywhere difference becomes about power and control instead of collaboration and a shared desire to reduce unnecessary suffering.

Racism is one of those glaring examples where repressed darkness in an individual or group block the very freedom that they espouse in the first place.

As we know, this defensiveness, “my” sense of control”, is built on a narrow range of feeling and thinking, limited to anger, hate, fear, shame, helplessness and spiritual insecurity to name a few.  The thinking is usually contrived structures of right and wrong.

Everyone has had personal experience of judging another because they have a different attitude or style of living but what we do with that judgement is where wisdom and a sense of emotional freedom can come about.

Dixon White : “I’m a Redneck and I Love America

For example, this video demonstrates the transformation from ignorance to wisdom: Dixon White “I’m a Redneck and I Love America”: .  In this instance he names the darkness he has been carrying unconsciously:  white supremacy and racism. He realizes the ignorance of that particular belief and how harmful it is.  It is powerful to hear a man name his darkness, let it go and then stand  by his/her new point of view.   Dixon White received over a million views in about two weeks.

We can find this honesty in our every day relationships.  It does not only apply to racism.

For example, we can ask ourselves, “How do I demean myself and/or others in my life?”  This could be as simple as repeatedly criticizing our partner or child.  It could be calling ourselves stupid or ugly.  It may be through manipulation of others to get your way or taking advantage of natural resources.

We are just asking a question to bring to light false beliefs.  We are not trying to be puritanical or perfect, just aware of inequality.  Perfectionism and puritanism breed unconscious judgement and rigidity and fears of all kinds.  Self awareness with less judgement provides balance.

“Recognition of the shadow is reason enough for humility, for genuine fear of the abysmal depths in man. This caution is most expedient, since the man without a shadow thinks himself harmless precisely because he is ignorant of his shadow.”  Jung, C. G. The Collected Works of C.G. Jung: Kindle location, 228303-228305)

Previous posts on the shadow and how to make use of it:  Page 1, Page 2, Page 3.

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Filed Under: Meditation & Psychology, Uncategorized Tagged With: C.G. Jung, darkness, defensiveness, dixon white, feelings, perfectionism, shadow, thoughts

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